2 Weeks Till My First BeyondBlue Talk.

Posted: September 6, 2014 in Dark days

Speaking to 60 men forces me to think about life advice that I will give. Firstly about my struggles but mainly what I have learnt from my struggles. That’s the point – finding the message within your dramas. Finding advice that will make a difference. Uncovering the lesson learnt from the pain.

It has made me think of the picture people have of me.The image I portray is dominated by my achievements. Stuff I have done that is worth bragging about.
The truth is that behind that image there is the real me, selectively letting people in. Bit like my days as a doorman. Letting in select customers to a private function.

I think everyone is the same. We decide which people see the real person standing behind the image.
Therefore, we shouldn’t really judge as we are only seeing the person they portray. Not the real person.
Once you realise this, it allows us to dismantle the image.

What you see is what you get.
After this realisation, it gave me the ability to speak more honestly. Tremendously uplifting. Often confronting. Keep in mind that many people are not prepared for the real truth. To be more humane, you must appreciate someone’s feelings if you are telling the truth. But cold, hard facts can set us free. And the pain doesn’t have to paralyse us. It is a sort of “Aha” moment that keeps us a deep contentment with who we are.

Real life example.
One of my clients, in Sydney Australia, is around 50 years old and very overweight. Has just been diagnosed with heart disease. I helped him organise his new lifestyle to be able to decrease stress and lower his body weight. I casually said that if he stays overweight he won’t need his superannuation. His family will get it. You see overweight men don’t live to enjoy their retirement. Think about it. Do you know any fat old guys? No. The vast majority of old guys are skinny. With this logic in mind I said to him to drop the weight or spend his retirement money as early as he could.
Not trying to be mean. It is just the truth. The quicker he gets thin the better his chances of a long life. Cold, hard facts.

Now as a registered ambassador for BeyondBlue there is a certain protocol that I must follow when I speak. I should keep a level head and speak modestly. I will play by the rules but will definitely make an impact.
Cold, hard truth will make for a confronting speech.
Sometimes you gotta rattle the cage to wake the animals up.

The other side is always worth the effort.

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